Why Not? - Lessons on Comedy, Courage, and Chutzpah

"Pursuing a career in comedy has always taken a lot of chutzpah. Today Mark Schiff looks back at his fifty-year career as a stand-up comic, actor, and writer and knows he's laughed with the best of them. His comedy and character have been widely praised by everyone from Jerry Seinfeld to Bill Maher, Paul Reiser, and Colin Quinn--as Seinfeld writes in his foreword, Mark is "the greatest comedy pal a guy could ever wish for"--but it hasn't always been easy. In this brilliantly honest collection of essays inducing both heart tugs and deep belly laughs, Mark recounts growing up Jewish in the outer boroughs of New York City and shares how he survived a harrowing childhood and managed health crises, aging, marriage, parenting, and career highs and lows. With wit and wisdom, Mark reminds us that no matter the troubles at-hand, the show must always go on. The result is an unforgettable and highly relatable account from one of the best humor writers of our time that will leave readers of all faiths energized and feeling like they've schmoozed with the best of them."--

List of contents

Foreword by Jerry Seinfeld

Introduction

 

1. Age

May You Live Till

Oy Vey Iz Mir

The Incredible Shrinking Man

The Show Must Go On

 

2. Community

Craving Community

I Don’t Have to Go, Now I Get to Go

It’s In You, So Share You

Amazing, Amazing

Gooood Shabbas

I Love My Neighborhood

 

3. Dieting

Excuse-Aholism

Jews, Non-Jews, and Weight Loss

My Downfall is Bread

Eat, Pray, Eat

You’re Too Thin

 

4. Family

Here Comes the Judge

I Used to Have a Life

What is a Typical Jewish Mother?

The Miserable Side of Dining Out

All You Need Is Love? Maybe

I Saw Ma

Traveling with My Father

The Orphan

 

5. Friends

The Importance of Friends

Get A Couple

Abu Mustafa Calls Me His Brother

The Big Snub

Don’t Ever Quit on Yourself

 

6. Funny

Consult Your Doctor

The War on Culture

What’s All the Complaining About?

The Most Jewish Comedian Ever

The Punchless Punchline

Heeere’s Mark Schiff

 

7. Helping Others

Coronavirus and Sumo Wrestling

Willingness

A Great Phone Call

A Valued Customer

As the World Turns

A Tight Twenty Minutes

Brother From a Different Mother

I Want to Be Around for All of You

My Uncle Miltie

Simon Says Do This

 

8. Hope

“B” Positive is Not Just a Blood Type

The Perfect Circle

Let There Be Light

The Blessing

Sealed with a Kiss

 

9. Kindness

Always Keep Your Promises to Your Dog

How a Christmas Gift Changed a Young Jewish Boy’s Life Forever

The Candy Man

The Haircut

Pause When Agitated

A Period of Transition

Ruby: A Lesson in Kindness

The Rumor Mill

 

10. Love

Don’t Fence Me In

The Good Old Days

I’m Proud of You

 

11. Marriage

Proof There is a God

Seinfeld, Bradley Cooper, and My Wife

Two Million

You Look Marvelous

 

12. Parenting

Great Catch, Champ

Never Talk While Eating Fish

They Are Back

The Nineteen Boxes

Smell My New Car

The Nearness of You

Pay Attention

Welcome to the Club

 

13. Self-Help

How to Accomplish Getting

Nothing Done

I Love Your Smile

Lost and Found

Nap Time

I Don’t Want to Exercise

Keep Your Two Cents to Yourself

 

14. Famous Friends

The Day Bob Dylan Came to My House

Katharine Hepburn and Me

Hey, Carl, Don’t Forget Your Toupee

What’s a Kid from the Bronx Doing Hanging Out with Sir Anthony Hopkins?

Free Cars

 

15. Stand-Up

The Night

“There Goes the Neighborhood”

The Road

Caesars to Cedars

Portrait of a Young Comedian

 

Acknowledgments

Photos

About the author

Mark Schiff is a stand-up comedian who has headlined at comedy clubs nationwide, including all the major casinos in Las Vegas and Atlantic City, and toured worldwide with Jerry Seinfeld for fifteen years. Mark has specials on HBO and Showtime, has appeared on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson and Late Night with David Letterman, is featured in Seinfeld’s Netflix special Jerry Before Seinfeld and Live from the Laugh Factory with Dom Irrera, and has been the featured act at the Montreal Just for Laughs Comedy Festival. He coedited I Killed: True Stories of the Road from America’s Top Comics with Ritch Shydner, is the playwright of Married People, cowritten with Steve Shaffer, which played to sold-out audiences in Los Angeles in 2019, and The Comic, which ran in Los Angeles for ten months as well as at the Aspen Comedy Festival, a regular contributor to LA’s Jewish Journal, and the host of the podcast You Don’t Know Schiff. Mark lives in Los Angeles with his first wife, his fifth dog, and photos of his three sons who have all moved out and have good jobs, yet still manage to call and ask for money.Jerry Seinfeld is an actor and comedian best-known as the creator of the TV show Seinfeld. He is the author of the New York Times bestsellers Is This Anything? and SeinLanguage, which reached #1 on the list. He lives in New York City and Los Angeles.

Summary

From master comedian Mark Schiff, a long-time touring partner of Jerry Seinfeld, comes a hilarious account of decades of foolery with comedy and acting legends and how he honed his mensch skills in all of life’s arenas.

Pursuing a career in comedy has always taken a lot of chutzpah. Today Mark Schiff looks back at his fifty-year career as a stand-up comic, actor, and writer and knows he’s laughed with the best of them. His comedy and character have been widely praised by everyone from Jerry Seinfeld to Bill Maher, Paul Reiser, and Colin Quinn—as Seinfeld writes in his foreword, Mark is “the greatest comedy pal a guy could ever wish for”—but it hasn’t always been easy.

In this brilliantly honest collection of essays inducing both heart tugs and deep belly laughs, Mark recounts growing up Jewish in the outer boroughs of New York City and shares how he survived a harrowing childhood and managed health crises, aging, marriage, parenting, and career highs and lows. With wit and wisdom, Mark reminds us that no matter the troubles at-hand, the show must always go on. The result is an unforgettable and highly relatable account from one of the best humor writers of our time that will leave readers of all faiths energized and feeling like they’ve schmoozed with the best of them. 

Foreword

Mainstream media targets to include outlets covering humor, human interest, Jewish media, LA media, NY media, and more: Outlets to include the likes of The Cut, Vulture, Mashable, HelloGiggles, Mic, Entertainment Weekly, WTF with Marc Maron, The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, Jimmy Kimmel Live!, The New Yorker, LA Times, and more.

Author’s podcast and tour to promote the book: The author will promote the book on his podcast and during his upcoming standup comedy tours. The podcast, You Don’t Know Schiff, launched in February 2022 and on it the author regularly interviews A-list comedians. It has over 100 five-star reviews on Apple Podcasts. A recent one-hour episode spotlighted the book (apple.co/3SPMgaI), and the author will continue to promote the book on the podcast. He will also be promoting it on his nationwide tour this fall and winter (https://bit.ly/SchiffTourDates) and be able to do signings at bookstores in the cities he performs in.

Releasing in time for the 2022 holidays: Extra promotion to be given to secure placement in holiday gift roundups. Humor books make ideal gifts.

Promotion by celebrity endorsers: Author will ask the celebrity endorsers and his massive, devoted community to promote the book on social, including Jerry Seinfeld, Bill Maher, Colin Quinn, and others.

Trade media outreach: Book is well-written and compelling and should elicit reviews from Publishers Weekly, Kirkus, Library Journal, Booklist, and Shelf Awareness.

Targeted digital advertising with SEO keywords to reach fans of comedy, Jewish audiences, Seinfeld fans, and those looking for holiday gifts.

Additional text

Advance praise for Why Not?:

“Starting out in stand-up comedy with Mark Schiff was a blast, and the humor he brought to the stage back then is now between the pages of this book, plus the wisdom you get when you add time.” —Bill Maher, host of Real Time with Bill Maher

“Mark’s book is funny, philosophical, and gentle.* And it makes sense because so is Mark. *Not gentile, gentle.” —Colin Quinn, comedian and actor on Saturday Night Live and Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn

“Mark Schiff knows how to tell a story and Mark Schiff knows how to write a book. I hope this is also an audiobook because nothing lulls me off to sleep more than Mark Schiff reading hilarious stories.” —Kevin Nealon, actor on Saturday Night Live and Weeds

“Mark Schiff is one of the funniest comedians I know. We came up together in the New York comedy club scene and he is endlessly entertaining and creative. This book will make you laugh, make you cry, and make you glad you bought it.” —Carol Leifer, comedian, Emmy Award-winning script writer, and producer

“I’ve always loved Schiff’s comedy and really love who he is as a person, especially his kindness. . . . His wonderful book of essays . . . makes you laugh, think, and cry a little, that’s actually something we should all do every day. Reading it made me miss him and appreciate him. I’m calling him right now. Get this book.” —Louie Anderson, comedian and Emmy Award-winning actor on Baskets

“The word ‘genius’ is overused, so I won’t use it here. But Mark Schiff’s unique and honest insights on parenthood, childhood, husbandhood, and pet ownerhood are hilarious without being mean-spirited and sentimental without being mawkish.” —Jeff Astrof, writer, showrunner, and executive producer of The New Adventures of Old Christine, Veronica's Closet, and Trial & Error

“Heart, comedy, soul, insight—a treasure chest of wonderful moments await all who open these pages.” —David Sacks, writer and producer of Final Space, The Simpsons, 3rd Rock from the Sun, and Murphy Brown

“Is there nothing better than a book that is funny and sensitive? That’s what Mark Schiff has created: a book that’ll make you laugh and warm your heart.” —Steve Bluestein, comedian and cofounder of The Groundlings comedy troupe and school

“Mark Schiff is a great comic, a one-of-a-kind singular voice in comedy. Everyone in our generation of the stand-up world can rattle off Mark’s best bits. This book perfectly captures and showcases his ghoulish, childish, Jewish, foolish, and hilarious style. The book reads fast and funny. It’s just like Mark. Once you’ve read it and loved it, it’ll be very hard to get it out of your house.” —Mike Binder, director and writer of The Mind of the Married Man, Reign Over Me, and The Comedy Store  

 

Praise for Mark Schiff:

“Mark Schiff is one of the funniest, the brightest, the best stage comics I have ever seen.” —Jerry Seinfeld

“If you can get him, I would do it, because there’s nobody funnier.” —Paul Reiser

Product details

• Authors: Mark Schiff, Mark Schiff
• Assisted by: Jerry Seinfeld (Foreword)
• Publisher: Ingram Publishers Services
• Languages: English
• Product format: Hardback
• Released: 08.11.2022
• EAN: 9781954641167
• ISBN: 978-1-954641-16-7
• No. of pages: 272
• Illustrations: 16 color photos
• Subjects: Fiction > Comic, cartoon, humour, satire; Humanities, art, music > Art > Theatre, ballet; BIOGRAPHY & AUTOBIOGRAPHY / Entertainment & Performing Arts, RELIGION / Judaism / Rituals & Practice, HUMOR / Topic / Marriage & Family, PERFORMING ARTS / Comedy, Humour, Judaism: life & practice, Judaism, Comedy & stand-up