Taking Charge of Anger - Six Steps to Asserting Yourself without Losing Control

Do you "see red" more often than you'd like--and find yourself saying things you'll regret? Are friends or coworkers complaining that your joking has a hostile edge? Has brooding over other people's bad behavior been keeping you up at night? This straight-talking book--grounded in over 25 years of experience--has already helped many tens of thousands of readers understand and manage destructive anger in all its forms. If you've decided you want to gain control of your anger, or if someone else has urged you to "get a grip--or else," anger expert Dr. Robert Nay has a message that might surprise you: There's nothing wrong with the way you feel. Anger can be a positive force that shows us when to stand up for what we want or need. It's what we do with our anger that makes the difference between solving a problem and making it worse. Dr. Nay's six-step plan for taking charge of anger is effective and easy to learn, and--unlike other programs--brings about lasting change. Clear explanations of all the different factors that can trigger anger, plus quizzes and worksheets that uncover what makes you mad, put you in the driver's seat. The second edition includes a new chapter on forgiveness, plus updated examples and resources. Dr. Nay guides you to: *Determine which of the five "faces of anger" are a problem for you, from passive-aggression to all-out rage.*Understand the anatomy of anger: what brings it on and how an anger episode unfolds.*Identify and change unrealistic expectations you have for yourself and other people.*Recognize the early warning signs of anger in your physical sensations and thoughts.*Master cooling-off strategies that work in the heat of the moment. Dr. Nay helps you make anger control second nature, even in stressful, hot-button situations. You'll learn all kinds of ways to stop an anger episode as it is first developing--before it takes on a life of its own. You'll also gain skills for dealing with other people's discourtesy or provocation. Techniques for defusing conflict and communicating your feelings calmly will enable you to put a lid on destructive anger while strongly asserting your needs. Based on the proven principles of cognitive-behavioral therapy, the approach presented here is optimistic, practical, and empowering. If anger is getting in the way of your goals--or disrupting the relationships most precious to you--the time to make changes is now.

List of contents

Introduction to the Second Edition Step One. Understanding and Recognizing Anger 1. The Faces of Anger: Whom Do You See in the Mirror? 2. Behind the Mask: Understanding Anger and Its Expression Step Two. Identifying and Preparing for Anger Triggers 3. Understanding Your Anger Triggers Step Three. Pinpointing Your Anger Early On and Dampening Arousal 4. Anger Awareness 5. Dampening Anger Arousal Step Four. Identifying and Changing Thoughts That Fuel Anger 6. Recognizing Thoughts That Fuel Anger 7. Rewriting Your Script: New Thinking for New Solutions Step Five. Staying Cool Under Fire 8. Assertive Problem Solving: Expressing Anger Constructively in Conflict Situations 9. When Anger Is Aimed at You Step Six. Staying the Course: Sustaining New Behavior and Coping with Roadblocks 10. Establishing New Anger Habits 11. Resolving Resentment and Considering When to Forgive When You Can't Forget 12. So You've Had a Setback: Getting Back on Track Appendix 1. Self-Assessment of Anger Questionnaire (SAQ) Appendix 2. Daily Anger Log Appendix 3. Personal Anger Scale Appendix 4. Anger Analysis Appendix 5. Relationship Anger Profile Suggested Resources

About the author

W. Robert Nay, PhD, is a clinical psychologist in private practice in McLean, Virginia, and Annapolis, Maryland, and Clinical Associate Professor at Georgetown University School of Medicine. He has trained thousands of mental health professionals nationwide to work on anger management and relationship issues with their clients. The author of [ital]Overcoming Anger in Your Relationship[/ital] and [ital]The Anger Management Workbook[/ital], Dr. Nay lives in Annapolis with his wife.

Summary

This straight-talking book—grounded in over 25 years of experience—has already helped many tens of thousands of readers understand and manage destructive anger in all its forms. Anger expert Dr. Robert Nay guides you to:

*Figure out which of the five faces of anger are a problem for you, from passive–aggression to all-out rage.
*Recognize the early warning signs of anger in your physical sensations and thoughts.
*Master cooling-off strategies that work in the heat of the moment.
*Identify and change unrealistic expectations you have for yourself and other people.
*Communicate effectively when differences arise.
*Practice your new skills in everyday life—until they become second nature.

The second edition includes a new chapter on forgiveness, plus updated examples and resources. If anger is getting in the way of your goals—or disrupting the relationships most precious to you—the time to make changes is now.
See also Dr. Nay's Anger Management Workbook: Use the STOP Method to Replace Destructive Responses with Constructive Behavior, which helps you build core anger management skills using interactive exercises, and Overcoming Anger in Your Relationship: How to Break the Cycle of Arguments, Put-Downs, and Stony Silences.

Additional text

This valuable book provides evidence-based techniques that can help you gain control of anger and communicate more effectively. Kudos to Dr. Nay for producing a guide that draws on extensive clinical and research experience--and that is straightforward, practical, and user friendly.--Donald Meichenbaum, PhD, Research Director, Melissa Institute for Violence Prevention and Treatment, MiamiIf you're among the many people who want to express anger more appropriately, this book offers real help. Using examples of anger problems we can all recognize, Dr. Nay provides clear and direct advice. He walks you through steps to curb anger and replace it with assertiveness--so you can get what you need without harm to self-esteem, reputation, or relationships. The six steps in this book will help you take charge of anger once and for all.--Margaret Wehrenberg, PsyD, author of The 10 Best-Ever Anxiety Management Techniques-Nay is an expert on anger management whose Taking Charge of Anger is a significant contribution.--Library Journal, 3/8/2012

Product details

• Authors: Donald Meichenbaum, W. Robert Nay, W. Robert (Georgetown University School of Medicine Nay, W.Robert Nay, Margaret Wehrenberg
• Publisher: Taylor and Francis
• Languages: English
• Product format: Hardback
• Released: 17.04.2012
• EAN: 9781462503803
• ISBN: 978-1-4625-0380-3
• No. of pages: 289
• Weight: 498 g
• Illustrations: Farb., s/w. Abb.
• Subjects: Guides > Self-help, everyday life > Lifestyle, personal development; Humanities, art, music > Religion/theology > Other religions; Non-fiction book > Psychology, esoterics, spirituality, anthroposophy > Psychology: general, reference works